Awkward Catholic

Living my faith as the awkward man of God that I am.

When No One’s Looking

Leave a comment

That awkward moment when you think you’re alone in the adoration chapel and let out a small bit of flatulence. Only to turn around and realize someone was in the back the whole time… not that this has ever happened to me.


Warning: this is an ugly, harsh post.


There are a lot of things we do when we think no one’s looking: we pick our noses, pass gas, sing out loud, dance, help and pray for others, judge others, cry, and so on. But there is one thing that many people do–so much so that it has become a pandemic, one of the world-destroying kind, and no, I’m not exaggerating. It’s called pornography and it’s everywhere. It’s become such an integral aspect of our culture that oftentimes, when a person speaks out against it, they are mocked and scorned, even by other Christians.


Yet porn has destroyed untold millions of lives. This seemingly harmless sin, an act often done in the quiet dark and selfish void of loneliness, is destroying our world. How is porn destroying our world? A few statistics should make the point nicely: 56% of marriages that end in divorce cite porn as one of the key problems[1]; more than ½ of boys and 1/3 of girls see their first pornographic image by the age of 13[2]; the average bad habit takes only six repetitions to become a habit. It takes only one exposure to become addicted to porn. Fifty percent of Christian young men say they are addicted to porn, and those are just the ones that are willing to admit it[3].


A great deal of research has been conducted on the effects of porn on the brain and how pornography dramatically and directly increases the risk of sexual deviance such as rape, homosexuality, pedophilia, and violence against women[4]. One of the results of the porn pandemic is a similar and related pandemic of human sex-trafficking. Up to 300,000 victims within the U.S. (not globally) are lured into the commercial sex trade every year[5]. Think about that: around 4 million babies are born in the U.S. every year. So, of the 11,000 babies born every day in the U.S., 822 of them will end up in the commercial sex industry. That means that every hour, somewhere in the U.S. 34 people (mostly young girls) are being manipulated or forced into the sex trade. The average age is between 11 & 14 years old[6].


Why? A major cause is porn. Eventually, a person’s imagination just simply can’t satisfy the lustful hunger with 2-dimentional images and many people compulsively act out on that hunger. Another fact, more women (i.e., young girls) are bought and sold in America on the day of the Super Bowl than on any other day of the year. The great test of strength and might we celebrate on the 1st Sunday of February is actually the most powerful witness to the lustful addiction and destruction of human life we have happily walked leaped into.


What’s my point? Porn and its partner sin of masturbation are NOT harmless! It is not a private matter. It doesn’t help marriages, nor does it relieve sexual pressure. Rather, it adds fuel to an unquenchable fire, one that consumes rather than purifies. It turns men into little boys with no impulse control and children into sex slaves, literally. Every. Single. Click. on porn helps finance sex slavery; even the free stuff costs someone their freedom.


Perhaps you don’t struggle with porn. God bless you and praise the Lord for protecting your heart, mind and body from this scourge. Pray for those who do struggle. If you are one of those who struggle, then God bless you. I know personally how hard the struggle can be. It seems as if the dark tunnel you are in has no end, has no light. But I am here to tell you that there is hope, that there is a Light. And to encourage you to use every available means to find that freedom you desire. The next time you are tempted to click on porn, think about your own child, or brother or sister being kidnapped and forced into sex slavery. Then grab your Rosary and pray for those who have been; pray as if your life depends upon it. In reality, porn is a gateway drug and eventually, when left unchecked it will devour your soul. It will crack the foundation of your home and it will destroy lives.


This is a harsh reality, and an ugly post; but a necessary one. As you watch the Super Bowl on February 1st remember this post, perhaps share this post. And then pray for all those whose lives are being destroyed by porn. And have hope. Hope in the God of mercy, the God of love. If you do struggle with an addiction to porn (or any addiction, really), remember that God wants your freedom more than you do. There is hope. No matter how many times you fall, get back up. Find someone to help you up and to help you stay standing. You can be free. You can be forgiven.


And please, visit these two sites for more resources and help with practical steps toward freedom:




Mary, Star of the Sea, pray for us.






  • ibid.









  • ibid.


Author: mgagnon181

I am a passionate Catholic, husband and a father of four kids. I have been a Catholic youth minister, writer and speaker for over 18 years and have earned a Master's in Theology with a minor in Philosophy. Through many years of struggle I've come to embrace my awkwardness and use it to the best of my ability to share my faith with others. God has blessed me with the gift of faith and has called me to serve him by serving young people and families and to help them encounter Christ in their lives. As Leon Bloy once said, "At the end of life there is only one great tragedy, not to have been a saint."

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s